I’ve had the same conversation with various men countless times in my life. They tell me that they prefer women who don’t wear too much makeup, women who look ‘natural.’
I say to them: ‘I actually wear a lot of makeup.’
And they’re like: ‘No, not you, you look natural.’
Here’s what it takes to look ‘natural’. After washing my face, I apply an acid cream, then I moisturise and apply suncream. This is followed by foundation or tinted moisturiser depending on the time of day, under-eye concealer, face powder, bronzer, blusher, then a highlighter. We haven’t even got to the eyes, but that’s nine layers on my face to achieve the ‘natural’ look.
Even without all those layers, my ‘natural’ look came at a cost. Last year, I went on Roaccutane for my acne, which was horrifically expensive, but worth every penny because of the change I felt in myself at not constantly battling spotty skin. It devastates me that it’s not available on the NHS as the pain that bad skin causes people can’t be underestimated. This article that went viral at the time said that The Best Skin-Care Trick Is Being Rich was right. I spent a lot of money on my skin so I was comfortable wearing it bare-faced. I don’t miss layering on foundation just to go to the shops, to try and hide my red, juicy, pulsating spots. Acne is a chronic condition and I’m grateful for every day that my skin is clear because it may not last.
2020 was also the year I got into eyebrow tinting and I’ve already booked my appointment for when BAMBROWS reopens at the end of April. My tinted eyebrows mean I now wake up with ‘naturally’ fuller-looking brows. I also pluck my eyebrows and maybe there are men who would fancy me more if I had eyebrow hairs creeping down my nose, but somehow, I doubt it. I’ve also had my teeth straightened and whitened. So even before the nine layers of creams, potions and powders I apply to my face, it’d be a stretch to label me ‘natural’ and I’m fine with that.
Seeking to be natural is surely along the same lines as seeking to be effortless, which is the pressure so often put on women which I covered in The men on Hinge want me to eat carbs. The role of makeup in feminism is confusing. As surely the very existence of makeup is sexist as it’s generally women who are expected to wear it and men who don’t. Therefore makeup must be something about oppression and looking good for men. And then we’re told by (not all) men that they want us looking natural.
The girl next door is a term used to describe a female archetype and fashion aesthetic which can range in terms of personal definition, but usually denotes a girl or woman who appeals to traditional or “all-American” gender norms with the allure of purity, simplicity, and charm, with a natural, modest, or effortless beauty.
Dictionary.com
I grew up inherently understanding that men of my generation liked that ‘girl next door’ look and took that to mean boys liked girls who were born with naturally straight hair, dewy, clear skin and two separate eyebrows rather than the monobrow I was born with. But as I don’t care whether or not I’m natural, I also don’t care about what the right feminist move is when it comes to makeup because I love makeup in all its glory.
One of the shows I watched in the earlier lockdown days was the reality TV show Glow Up, where wannabe makeup artists compete to win the makeup opportunity of a lifetime. What struck me was how many of the contestants’ stories were about how they were bullied or experienced similar struggles, but then found solace and confident expression through makeup. I’ve since noticed this narrative is also often true for the YouTube makeup stars. I, too have always loved how applying makeup so often feels like applying war paint: it always puts me in the mood, whether that’s for a presentation, meeting or a date.
Makeup is so much more than armour to wear to face the world. The application of makeup is a wonderful place for creativity and play. I love experimenting with eyeshadow colours (affordable ELF is the best), playing with different lip looks and mastering my eyeliner flicks. I find nothing more instantly empowering than putting on a bold lipstick. I don’t like men who tell me they don’t like strong lipstick colours on women. Thankfully, I’ve not come across too many of them since my mid-twenties.
It took until lockdown V3, which we’re entering the third month of now, to realise how much I missed wearing makeup. In the before times, I’d work from home bare-faced and then, most evenings, I’d enjoy the process of layering and flickering up and skipping out into the world, feeling good and ready to socialise. I missed that transformation and I missed the boost it gave me and the artful play of it all. One of the first articles I published was a guide to confidence, where I wrote the simple truth that you feel good when you look good.
If giving a speech in front of lots of people — don’t imagine the room naked, because that’d be ugly. Close your eyes before you go on and breathe in the excitement that you are going to be the centre of attention for the next however many minutes. And about time. Wear good lipstick.
On makeup — if its something you’re not good at, go to a makeup counter and get a makeover redeemable against product purchase. Do this before a special event and savour all the compliments you get.
Now, on most days, I like to wear makeup because we still need to feel good while we’re stuck at home. There’s also something cool about applying makeup just for myself and my reflection. And when we’re allowed back out again, I don’t seek to appear natural to please others. I want to be as bold, playful and confident as a gold eyeshadow paired with a berry-red lipstick.
My 'natural' look came at a cost
True about Roaccutane. It's the only thing that has vastly improved my skin.